Captain Olimar, Private Eye
by Lex the Kitsune
Summary: Olimar has been named the self-proclaimed Detective for the smash bros mansion. Joining him is an overweight pikmin. Will they take care of crime, or just cause more trouble than they fix? rated K
1. The Chaos Emerald Capper

Hey, the purely insane Lex got Brawl

Hey, the purely insane Lex got Brawl! And I just can't get over Olimar being in it so here I go with another fic. What if Olimar was the Smash mansion's detective? Well something like this. Of course I know Olimar isn't as he is in this fic, but it's just for fun. He's still himself, just abit younger y'know?

Disclaimer: I don't own anyone in this fic.

So start the fic already because I got to get to brawl so yeah… ROLL IT!

_It was another day in the smash mansion; a brawl was taking place in Shadow Mosses Island, between four very tough opponents. Well, at least three since one was Wario but anyways the others were Sonic, Lucario, and Pikachu. It was a Stock match, with all of them tied up at one stock left._

_Then, the smash ball appeared. Of course Sonic grabbed it first, transforming as all the others lunged for it. All of a sudden the lights shut off; a loud painful scream was heard as Sonic's light was stopped. The lights flickered on again, and the three smashers were against the walls, but Sonic was out cold on the floor, and his chaos emeralds had disappeared…_

_Case one, The Chaos Emerald Capper._

Olimar walked out of his room wearing a plaid shirt instead of his space uniform, and a plaid hat replaced his helmet. To finish the Sherlock Homeless look a small soap bubble pipe was in his mouth, which he blew into a few times. "Are you gonna be a hobo for Halloween?" A rather fat purple pikmin asked, eating a small chicken leg. Olimar said nothing, other than coughing a lot and choking. He quickly ran inside his room and slammed the door.

-one minute later-

Olimar walked back out with his helmet back on, feeling much better but still wearing the outfit. "Sorry bout that, forgot about the deadly oxygen. So you think Im a hobo huh? Then you'll have to follow me all around taking notes. Got it?" Olimar said, blowing into the pipe and watching the bubbles stick onto the inside of his helmet and go back into the bubble soap storage tank.

"But I got a date with a Pop tart!" The purple pikmin (I'll name him buddy) said. "I see…" Olimar grabbed his whistle out of his pocket and blew into it, Buddy's eyes turned swirly "what do you wish master?" Buddy said in a monotone voice. "Just follow me and write notes" Olimar instructed, walking off to interagate his first suspect, Wario.

Buddy followed, his eyes back to normal and the leftover drumstick from yesterday was back in his blubbery hands. He entered the elevator at the end of the hall and pushed the MK button (the rooms aren't listed by number, just by series.) Olimar whistled Ai no Uta to himself while the elevator moved up. It stopped for a moment to let Bowser onto the elevator. The Koopa King couldn't help but notice Olimar whistling "Hey who sings that anyways?" Bowser asked, leaning against the wall of the elevator. " Some guy named Kumi Koda." Olimar replied. "Yeah let's hope you don't ruin it by adding your own soundtrack." Bowser laughed and got off the elevator one floor before Olimar did.

The brave captain and the chubby pikmin looked at the door labeled WaReo's Ruum. "Well, here we go." Olimar shrugged as he reached for the doorknob.

-WaReo's Ruum.-

Wario's room was one of the most disgusting rooms ever, banana peels littered the floor, a lampshade was stuck in green slime, Oil covered the walls, the light was several jars of toxic waste, boogers littered a poster of Mario on the wall, a dead Goldfish was splattered on the floor still wiggling, there were leaking pipes dripping brown lumps into a corner, and Wario's bed looked like a giant pit of regurgitated items he had eaten during brawls.

"Ewwwwww, I don't like this." Buddy frowned, shaking a dried up onion off his foot. "Yeah, good thing my helmet filters the air. This would kill me" Olimar pulled his helmet's antenna and a car air freshener popped out from one of his helmet's compartments. Wario himself suddenly came from the bathroom scratching himself with toilet paper on his back. "Wario Wario of the Mushroom Kingdom!" Olimar snapped, pointing at him with a gloved finger. "WAAAAH!" Wario jumped in surprise, hiding his head between his knees from being startled so fast.

"HAH! Oh my- did you see his face?! His mouth was wider than a Bulbax!" Olimar laughed so much his sides almost split. He had to resist before he broke his back again, Toon Link didn't let him heard the end of it when he (Almost) did a double backwards bounce to avoid the cartoon's final smash.

"What do you want loser? Im busy being awesome!" Wario did a small dance, pointed to the roof and farted. "That's just not right." Buddy gagged but Olimar held strong. "I need to give you a lie detector test. So come on." Olimar left the room, having trouble opening the door for a moment because of some sludge that was in the way with a sticky note on it with the words "my first-" written on it.

"And why should I do that?" Wario growled, stomping his short foot on the ground. "Because I know your weakness." Olimar grinned, pulling out a bottle of Ultra Disinfectant spray (Pikmin fans should get a kick out of that one). "WHOA! Hey, hang on there I don't want any trouble here just don't point that thing at me!" Wario reached for the sky and followed Olimar, walking down the hall letting pit stink wander into other smashers rooms.

-Mario's Room-

Mario's room was a nice and neat red colored room, a potted plant next to a TV with a Wii plugged in. The walls were evenly painted, the rooms had just the right balance. It was a great room, overall. "Hold on-a a moment Luigi. Nature's calling." Mario paused the Super Mario Strikers game for a minute to go to the bathroom.

"Take your time-a" Luigi said, lying back on the couch and humming to himself. Wario's pit stink snuck into the room, giving Luigi the shivers "Mama Mia, how much pasta DOES Mario eat-a?" Luigi covered his nose. Unknown to him, Mario was referring to the birds he was photographing for Peach's scrapbook. It was so convenient that the nest was on the tree next to Mario's bathroom window.

-Broom closet-

Olimar had set up a lie detector test that was kept in the broom closet. The Smash Bros Broom Closet was a subspace room holding almost everything imaginable, but was concealed as an ordinary broom closet. Why they had to hide it was something only Crazy Hand knew, and he had no intention of giving it up.

"So Wario, let's start easy. Is your real name Wario?" Olimar asked. " Yeah" Wario replied. The lie detector beeped angrily, revealing the first lie. "Uh, I mean my name is Mr. Cool." The lie detector went off again. Wario's eyes shifted as he looked at Buddy, back at Olimar, then buddy. Of course he didn't know that pikmin had no eyelids so he thought Buddy was staring him down suspiciously (seriously, I haven't seen a pikmin blink.)

"OKAY FINE! MY NAME'S NOT WARIO! IT'S CUDDLY WUDDLY SNIPPYBOTTOMS THE THIRD! I JUST CHANGED IT SO I WOULDN'T BE MOCKED! DON'T TELL ANYONE!" Wario screamed. BING! Olimar looked up from a newspaper titled Lucas Faints after jigglypuff fight. "Oh sorry, what did you say?" Olimar asked. "Nothing" Wario muttered. "Okay then, are you greedy?" Olimar said while Buddy scribbled something down.

"Hey, who ya calling greedy?! Im generous" BEEEEEEEEEEP! Another lie. "Right. So most importantly, did you take Sonic's emeralds?" Olimar asked. "No but I did take Link's master sword and used it as a back scratcher." BING! True, everyone give him a round of applause, that was his first truthful sentence that he didn't scream! "Okay, Wario you are free to go." Olimar said, leaving the closet.

"Well he's innocent, surprisingly. I thought he did it because he's money greedy. Anyways who's left?" Buddy checked his notepad, flipping past all his previous notes. "Lucario and Pikachu." Buddy Replied. Olimar pondered something, Lucario liked power right? Well no one knew because the guy was anti-social but Pikachu seemed like someone who would be last resort.

"Okay then, our next suspect is Lucario" Olimar said, blowing into his pipe as he headed back to the elevator. He was about to go in, but Ness ran out followed by Meta knight who was covered in frayed wire and paint. "Weird, frayed wired and paint…that paint looks like the Shadow Moses wallpaper." Olimar shrugged, entered the elevator and pressed the Poke button. He waited abit, since the poke floor was a longer distance away from the MK floor (btw the elevators move up, down, or sideways to save height.) The elevator stopped a moment and let Yoshi on.

Yoshi was currently eating Doritos and seemed very happy to be doing so. "Hey Yoshi, let me have some" Buddy said, sticking his hand out. "Yoshi" Yoshi said, holding his Doritos tighter. "What do you mean you can't share?" buddy asked peeved. "Yoshi Wah!" "Oh come on! Dr. Mario did NOT prescribe those to you!" "Yoshi!" "Oh, now with the fat jokes! I'm not fat, just horizontally challenged!"

"Yoooshi…" Yoshi said sarcastically, swallowing the Doritos bag and getting off at the EB floor. Buddy sighed; he crumpled up a piece of paper and ate it. Finally they reached the Poke floor. Olimar walked down to Lucario's Room and opened the door.

-Lucario's POW!

Olimar barely avoided a punch to the face from Lucario whose genius idea it was to have a punching bag in front of his door. "Write that down as assault of authority." Olimar instructed as buddy scribbled things down. Lucario's room might have been mistaken as the room for someone who only lived for fighting. The windows had targets on them, the bathroom had a swinging punching bag, the closet was filled with dented metal, and the bed was a flat rock with a smaller rock on it serving as a pillow.

"_Leave me alone" _Lucario thought, continuing his assault on the punch bag. "Sorry to disturb you, but I need a few questions answered. Olimar said, wondering how the punching bag survived all the hits. "_Fine, ask then leave" _Lucario thought, abandoning the punch bag and heading for a treadmill. "Okay then, what do you think about Sonic?" "_He's fast, too cocky and another smasher" _Lucario thought, not breaking a sweat. "So out of jealousy of speed, did you take his emeralds?" Olimar asked. Lucario nodded no and that look in his eye told him it was true, that is if a menacing glare was true.

"Okay then, thanks" Olimar said walking away when the door opened up suddenly and a koopa walked in with a glowing package "Here's the thing you wanted me to get from the stage but I don't know why you wanted it so secret." The koopa said. "_Just put it over there by the wire cutters._" Lucario thought as the koopa put it down. "Wire cutters…" Olimar muttered, pondering it before heading back to the elevator.

"So Pikachu did it?" Buddy nibbled his hand, thinking it was abit strange. "Well it seems so, but I don't like jumping to conclusions." Olimar said, heading to the elevator again, this time Zero Suit Samus was in before him. He pressed the PKMN floor and waited…and waited, and waited…. "…..Aren't you gonna ask why Im in the Zero suit or stare or somethin?" Samus asked. "Uhhh….no not really no." Olimar replied.

"Not even a glance?" "Nope" "huh……." "….." "You sure?" "Yes, quite." "Why?" "Partly cause Im married, partly because if you were at my home planet you'd be freakishly tall, partly because Im not really interested."

"So you think Im hideous?" "No not at all, you're an attractive athletic young woman, but Im just not looking at people like that much." "So your get up and go get em days are over then?" "Yes, they have been for a while." "Weird, Im used to so much attention." Soon enough the elevator was converted into a therapy room.

"It's just people don't really see me much without the power suit, and when they do its all eyes on me." Olimar blew into his pipe as buddy wrote things down. "Well I think you should simply tell whoever does that you're not comfortable when they're staring, thereby you get your feelings out with embarrassing yourself or seeming harsh. Take some time each day to practice saying it to be comfortable saying it in public." Olimar said professionally.

The elevator stopped and Samus got off, Olimar getting off three floors later. "I didn't know you were a therapist." Buddy said. "Im not, I was reading a fortune cookie" Olimar grinned and threw the slip of paper into a recycling bin. Buddy got to the door first and knocked. Pikachu opened the door, his head wrapped in a towel. "Pika?" the mouse asked. "Pikachu, we need to ask you some questions."

"Pika pi!" Pikachu whined and shut the door. "Looks like we'll have to do the good cop, bad cop thing huh? I'll go first." Olimar busted open the door and stomped up to Pikachu "YOU'RE THE ONE KNOWN AS PIKACHU, DID YOU TAKE SONIC'S EMERALDS?" Olimar growled. "Pika?" Pikachu asked tilting his head. "DON'T TOY WITH ME! ANSWER THE QUESTION!" "Pika pi chu…." Pikachu sighed and began the flashback.

_Pika pi pikachu pika pika pi. Chu, Pika pi, pi, pikACHU! Pika pi, Chu pika pikachu. Pika kachu, pi pi pi. Pika-_

"HOLD IT! THE SNACK MACHINE CAN'T SAY GAZUNTITE!" Olimar barked. "I'll be right back." Olimar left the room and entered shortly after. "Soda pop?" Olimar asked. "Pikachu" Pikachu shrugged. "Okay here you go." Olimar handed Pikachu the soda and sat down calmly. "Pikachu, I know you didn't do it. You and I aren't so different." Olimar said. "Pika?" Pikachu asked. "Yep. But do you know of anyone who might have stolen Sonic's emeralds?" Olimar asked. "Pika, pika pies Chu, pikachu pi kachu." Pikachu said. "Okay, thanks." Olimar said, walking out of the room.

"The good cop bad cop thing worked perfectly!" Olimar grinned. "I thought it was with two cops." Buddy said. "Poor little buddy, Im a lone worker. Except for you and about 9999998 other pikmin slaves." Olimar said briefly. "Huh?" "What?"

"So who did it then?" Buddy asked. "It could be anyone. Wario, Lucario, Pikachu, or that plant." Olimar said. "Olimar that's just a potted plant." Buddy said. "But remember I've had experiences with plants hiding. Watch." Olimar approached the potted plant slowly and slapped a leaf. Nothing. "Okay it is a potted plant but that only means that I'll have to see your notes." Olimar said. "Uh, no you don't." Buddy said, holding his notes tightly.

"C'mon hand them over or else it's the whistle." Olimar reached for his pocket. "Okay fine" Buddy hesitated and handed over the notes. "Okay let's see…. Buddy, these aren't notes. Their doodles!" Olimar was right; every page had detailed drawings of all the smashers they had encountered. There was a picture of Meta knight covered in wire and paint; there was a picture of Lucario and the strange koopa. There even was a detailed drawing of Zero Suit Samus with the words 'misunderstood' written on the side.

"Misunderstood? Wait a minute….THATS IT! Buddy, call everyone for a meeting in the grand hall! I have a criminal to catch." Olimar ran off leaving Buddy speechless.

-Grand hall-

Every smasher was seated, conversing about why they were called there. Master hand and buddy were on the stage along with Sonic who was sitting down tiredly. "Attention Smashers, we have received news from Captain Olimar that he has cracked the case of the chaos emerald capper even though we never put him on the case in the first place." Master hand said. Crazy hand cheered from the crowd, clapping his thumb and pinky together. "Uh yes, so anyways presenting Olimar." Master hand floated aside as Olimar ran onto the stage.

"Everyone! I know who has done the crimes committed at Shadow mosses Island yesterday. It was none other than DIDDY KONG! He switched off the lights!" Olimar said, pointing directly at the chimp. "Wha? But I didn't….I just…OH FINE! The jig is up, I switched the lights off for a prank but I didn't take the emeralds! Honest!" Diddy Kong screamed, emptying his pockets of only banana peels.

"Then who took them?" asked Zelda, there was commotion from the crowd. "Simple. The Chaos emerald capper is none other than him!" Olimar pointed at… a snack machine?

"Huh?" everyone said, confused by the captain's words. "Explain how a snack machine took the emeralds." Master Hand said. "Very well" Olimar said and the flashback began.

_When I was interrogating Pikachu, I went to go get him a soda for the good cop routine. But when I got to the snack machine, I saw an extra button next to the change return. I didn't press it, but when Buddy showed me the picture he drew with Misunderstood, I knew I misunderstood the button and raced off to find out what it did._

"So here it is" Olimar said, jumping off the stage and pressing the button. Out of the slot popped out none other than…. Bowser Jr? "Hey what gives?!" Jr said angrily. "What gives is that you took the emeralds from Sonic out of greed that you weren't a playable character. And because they were shiny." Olimar said.

Jr nodded "Impressive Olimar, I guess you're not the clueless old man that I thought you were." Jr grinned. "Who's clueless? What old man. Who thought?" Said Professor Egadd from Luigi's mansion. "Wait a moment, what about Meta knight? He was covered in wires and paint." Buddy said.

"Ness played a trick on me, replacing spaghetti with exploding wires. When I ran out of the room, he had a bucket of paint on my door." Meta Knight said, glaring daggers at Ness. "But Lucario had wire cutters and the glowing package." Buddy added. "_I was borrowing the cutters from Snake to cut the wires of those teenagers who are stealing my cable television. No longer shall I miss A Haunting." _Lucario thought.

"But the package?" buddy said. "_Uh, nothing important is in there." _ Lucario thought nervously for only the second time in his life. "I got the package" The koopa from earlier said, opening it and revealing a video camera with footage of Lucario feeding kittens at a shelter. The camera was left on, which was the strange glow it emitted.

"So that's it, I call this case closed! By the power vested in me by an insane author who's writing this, I sentence you Bowser Jr to a two minute spanking and talk from your father." Olimar said. "NOOOOOO! Im not going without a fight!" Jr said, balling up his fists.

"Then we'll settle this the old fashioned way huh?" Olimar said. The entire place faded black. The stage was being used as a battle in a Paper Mario TTYD kind of fight.

Koopa Prince Bowser Jr would like to battle.

Captain Olimar & Pikmin Buddy accept.

Olimar used Research. "Bowser Jr, hp 30 attack 4 defense 1. Bowser Jr is a semi-spoiled little koopaling from the Mario series. His magic brush is a force to be reckoned with, but his weakness is unknown. Beware, his Whining screech can break defense down into rubble."

Buddy used Eat. Buddy gained 5 hp from eating fries.

Bowser Jr used Paint, Buddy lost 4 hp!

Olimar used Whistle; Bowser Jr's defense was cut in half.

Buddy used Chef. Bowser Jr lost 3 hp, yet taste buds gained 5 TP.

Bowser Jr used fire breath. Captain Olimar lost 5 hp.

Olimar used Item Crowd. Crowd member: Crazy Hand.

Crazy Hand used seizer! 10 hp was taken from Jr, Olimar, and buddy!

Buddy Fainted.

Captain Olimar revived Buddy with Whistle.

Bowser Jr used Item Crowd. Crowd member: Tingle.

Tingle used dance, Olimar was confused at seeing a 40 year old man in a tight fairy costume dance.

Olimar's Sherlock Homeless costume prevented confusion.

Smash Ball item appeared.

Olimar used Ship. Smash ball breaks on Olimar.

Buddy used Oil grease. Bowser Jr was blinded.

Bowser Jr used fire breath, but it missed!

Olimar used End of Day. Bowser Jr lost 50 hp.

Olimar gained 40 exp

Buddy gained 20 exp.

Match over.

"Well that was weird" Buddy said as everything turned back to normal, Jr on the floor as a trophy. Olimar walked up and revived him. "Jr, you're a good fighter. I'll take off your punishment if you join me on the detective side of things." Olimar said, extending his hand.

"Is there free grape juice?" Jr asked. "Uh, yeah sure." "Then it's a deal."

_And so the case of the chaos emerald capper was closed, Jr returned Sonic's emeralds in exchange for grape juice. It seemed like peace was restored until…_

"Hey guys, where did Game and Watch go?" Diddy asked. Everyone shrugged; no one had seen Game and Watch. "Looks like another case" Olimar said, running off to find Game and Watch. Then, there was a bright light…

--

So where is Game and Watch, and is Jr gonna be a good partner? And will you stop staring at Zero Suit Samus already? Find out in the next chapter. Of Olimar Private eye: Case two, the kidnapping of Game and Watch.


	2. The Missing Game

Wow, I feel some kind of happiness that this fic got reviews on its launch date

Wow, I feel some kind of happiness that this fic got reviews on its launch date. Now I don't own anyone in this story other than Buddy. So without anything else out of me let's see the second case in:

Captain Olimar: Private eye

_Bowser Jr agreed to help Olimar in his cases, and during their glory moment of solving their first case, someone noticed something odd. "Hey guys, where did Game and Watch go?" Diddy asked. Everyone shrugged, no one had seen game and watch all day._

"_Looks like another case" Olimar said, beginning his search for game and watch. Then, there was a bright light… When the light cleared, there was writing on the walls hastily sprayed with a slimy goop. The words were 'Look Out Olimar, Keep Interest Nowhere.'_

_Case two, the Game and watch kidnapping._

"Looks like someone has it out for you" Jr said as Buddy sketched the writing. "Weird huh? When was the last time any of you have seen Game and Watch?" Olimar asked the crowd. "I saw him walking down the main hall yesterday." Pit said. "I saw him in my window" Zelda said "I saw him stealing my trail mix" King DeeDeeDee said. "Yoshi!" said anonymous (Anonymous didn't want his name in this for safety reasons.).

"Well that gives us places to look then. I'll check the main hall, Buddy you check in Dedede's kitchen and Jr you check Zelda's room." Olimar said, the team splitting up to their locations.

-The main hall-

The main hall was just that, a hall with doors leading to Master and Crazy hand's rooms with a box at the end, but Olimar knew that either hand would have seen Game and watch anyways. "Huh, nothings here but then again…" Olimar lifted a cardboard box to reveal Snake holding a note. "Hey! Don't intrude my box-fort. Wait, your Marlio right?" Snake asked. "It's Olimar." "Right, some flat guy wanted me to give you this." Snake handed Olimar the note. It read 'They're Here Everywhere'

"Huh. Did you see where the flat guy went?" Olimar asked hopefully. "Nope, but he did say something about trail mix" Snake said before ducking into his box and shuffling away. _'Trail mix…King Dedede's trail mix…' _Olimar thought and ran off to the elevator.

He entered and pressed the K button, although the elevator stopped for Captain Falcon. _"Oh no, not him again! Just ignore him" _Olimar thought, whipping out his DS to play New Super Mario Bros. Captain Falcon looked over and began the back seat gaming. "Jump on the turtle." "Hit the goomba" "Sweet, power up." Falcon grinned. "Dude, that coin was like right there!" Once the elevator stopped Olimar dashed out only to run smack-dab into DK, but with Falcon leaning over Olimar's shoulder, he fell over as well into a dog pile.

"Ow… my ribcage." Olimar Groaned, limping off and leaving Falcon with DK.

-Dedede's kitchen-

Buddy looked around and wiped the tears from his mouth, or drool or a mixture of both but anyways he was in fat guy heaven. There were so many foods in the refrigerator, from Moo Moo farm milk to Shroom Fry to Watermelon Pie to carrot cake to Chili dogs to beef. On the counter though, was a golden bag of Trail Mix standing proudly, with delicious melty M&M's but then its crunchy mini-Pretzels will catch you off guard. Yet the soothing but zesty Doritos will add the delicious addiction.

"Maybe just one pawful" Buddy said, only to grab the bag and devour its contents. Instead a note popped out. 'We Eat Leftovers, Loser.' Was scribbled on it. "Weird." Buddy was about to leave when he bumped into Meta Knight. "BEWARE I KNOW FAT-FU! Wait a moment…what are you doing here Meta Knight?" Buddy asked. "Uh, just getting a simple spoon for the king's soup. He is dreadfully hungry." Meta Knight said. "Okay, see you." Buddy left the room.

Meta Knight's eyes shifted and he opened the refrigerator, pulling out a box of Ice Cream. He opened it and smelled the fresh artic scent. A wire snapped and Lucario fell from the roof, apparently waiting for Buddy to leave but fell anyways. The two stared until Lucario spoke "Share and I won't tell." "Deal" The two shook hands and began eating ice cream.

-Outside Dedede's room-

Olimar managed to fix his ribs with an ancient Hocotatian method, but anyways He met up with Buddy. "Well I found a note, how about you?" Olimar asked. "Trail mix and a note" Buddy replied. "There's only one more thing to do, let's check on Jr." Olimar said as he walked off to the elevator.

Buddy got in and pressed the LOZ button. The two waited for their arrival.

-Zelda's Room-

Jr had looked around the rooms without touching anything, but no game and watch. "Dang, it looks like I'll have to look in the nooks and crannies then." Jr said to no one in particular, opening drawers, boxes, refrigerators, bank accounts, and windows but there was no sign of him.

Jr opened the closet and rummaged through the dry cleaning bags. Game and Watch could literally be anywhere. "Let's see, a dress, dresses, a costume, some kind of frilly thingy, a slingshot, tickets to 101 Nights the movie, a bat, some ice Cream…"

Jr abandoned the closet only to search under the mattress. "Quarters, hair brush, Shot Gun, Chicken Soup for the Teenage soul, Luigi's shoe, Link's hat, a spring." The koopaling ran off to the kitchen to check the cabinets. "Soup, Beans, Diet sprite, Very Fancy Doilies, a nail…" Jr checked everywhere, pocketing some coins he found under the couch but then he noticed a note on the fridge.

**2 do list**

**Send txt to Link**

**Try and beat twilight princess**

**Underline more words**

**Find Luigi's Shoe**

**Free Willy**

"Weird, Jr said not noticing a bucket of white-out falling from a high counter and erasing every word other than the beginning ones. Jr shrugged and dried it off to pocket it anyways. He left the room unaware that he left the room a mess.

-Smash Bros Cafeteria-

The three detectives met for lunch to discuss the notes. "Okay let's see what we have" Olimar said, putting down his Ramen Noodles for a moment to organize the notes.

"We have, Look out Olimar Keep-Interest Nowhere-They're Here Everywhere- Send Try Underline Find Free-and We Eat Leftovers Losers…" Olimar said, spreading the notes on the table.

"It makes no sense. Hey, crunch-atize me captain." Buddy said, Olimar obliged and passed the Captain Crunch. (I had to put that joke in, it was driving me nuts.) "Wait a moment…" Olimar lined up the notes and… he was stumped. "It doesn't make sense, this must have been put together by a genius or a secret agent or a teenager with too much time on his hands who is obsessed with video games." Jr shrugged, sipping his Chuckola-Cola.

"Wait say that again." Olimar said suddenly. "It doesn't make sense." "No after that" "Obsessed with games" "before that" "A secret-" "STOP! I got it!" Olimar said as he ran off to the MK floor. "What's with him?" Jr asked. "Get used to it." Buddy said simply, continuing to eat the mountain loads of cereal he had.

-Mario's Room-

Olimar successfully snuck into Mario's room which was easy since the door was open. He entered the bedroom and saw a small suitcase watching TV. "Huh? Hello, Im Stuffwell" (the briefcase Mario lugs around in Mario and Luigi: Partners in Time.) "Right, do me a favor and open for me." Olimar said. "Sorry, no can-do. I only open for a password."

"Is it Peach?"

"No"

"Mushroom?"

"No"

"Luigi?"

"No"

"Bowser sucks?"

"No"

"Your mom?"  
"No"

"Peach is hot?"

"No"

"I hate my fans?"

"No"

"Final Smash?"

"No"

"Jumpman?"

"No"

"Sonic is stupid?"

"No"

"Hannah Montana sucks?"

"Even though I agree, it's not the password"

"Its-a me, Mario?"

"No"

"Mario Bros?"

"No"

"Mario strikers?"

"No"

"ARGH!!OPEN UP YOU STUPID BRIEFCASE!"

"Wow how did you know?" Stuffwell was baffled and opened up; revealing…some socks, Peach's diary, a mustache comb, and a copy of the colorful clown comes to town. "What? He had to be here, the clues all point to it!" Olimar said, pacing back and forth. "Let's see, we checked Dedede's kitchen, Zelda's Room, the main hall, that's every clue. Wait" Olimar thought back to what Anonymous had said.

"Yoshi" said Anonymous as he walked into the room. "(secure information), there you are. What do you mean I haven't checked his room?" Olimar asked. "Yoshi" Anonymous replied, explaining a missing piece of the puzzle. "Oh, right. Thanks" Olimar ran off to the elevator and pressed the CLASSIC button.

-Samus' room-

A box, that's all there was suspicious. Who was in the box, well isn't it obvious? Samus hadn't noticed it yet, as it was cleverly hidden in the middle of her living room. Snake moved abit, sighing in relief that Samus hadn't taken note of it. Snake moved closer, hitting the wall by mistake. His heart stopped, but Samus continued to watch television.

"_Gotta be more careful" _Snake thought as he moved abit to the right, knocking over a vase. Samus remained fixated on the Mighty Putty commercial, not noticing that the 1000003 thousand dollar vase was knocked over and broken. "_that was too close_" Snake thought, backing up abit only to hit a lamp that knocked over a bigger lamp that knocked over a bookshelf, causing a frayed wire explosion.

Snake kicked himself, yet Samus didn't notice a thing. "Jeez, she's deaf" Snake whispered to himself. "What was that?" Samus wondered, grabbing the Plasma Whip from under the sofa mattress. "Uh, nothing" Snake said, smacking himself for stupidity. "Oh okay. Hey wait a moment, cardboard boxes don't talk." Samus lifted the box, revealing Snake and the classic 'you've been found' noise.

"Oh Moblin…" Snake mumbled, trying to saw a hole in the floor to escape from. "Seventh time this week Snake, and it's Monday." Samus said, grabbing Snake by the sneaking suit and throwing him out the window.

-Game and Watch's room-

Well, his room was plain. It was white, with no furniture, no plants, a small window, and that's it. Wait a window? That's too un-plain to be Game and Watch. Olimar walked towards the window and felt it with his hand, peeling it off the wall to reveal a stairway. He followed cautiously and found…A surveillance room, Game and Watch being the security guard. "BEEP!" Game and Watch said, unhappy that his area was invaded.

"Sorry to disturb you, but why are you hiding here? I looked all over the place for you!" Olimar asked. Game and Watch began explaining

"_Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep"_

"_Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep"_

"I see, so you make sure no rules are broken?" "Beep" "Okay then but why did the lights go out?" "Beep, bop, beep" "Power outage? Well what's with the notes?" "Beep" "Oh teenagers…well case solved." Olimar grinned and left to the cafeteria once more to meet up with his investigation team.

" okay I found Game and Watch, case closed." Olimar said finishing his Ramen noodles as Snake fell outside the window. "So what happened? Where is he?" Buddy asked. "He is in the heart of every child, in the smile of every baby, and in his room acting security guard." Olimar said.

"How'd you figure it out?" Asked Jr who was trying to find a quarter he dropped. "Simple really. All the notes together form a secret message. Every first letter. Watch."

**Look**

**Out**

**Olimar**

**Keep**

**Interest**

**Nowhere**

**They're **

**Here**

**Everywhere **

**Send**

**Try**

**Underline **

**Find **

**Free**

**We **

**Eat **

**Leftovers **

**Losers**

"Now take out the letters except for the first in each." Olimar pointed it out.

**L**

**O**

**O**

**K**

**I**

**N**

**T**

**H**

**E**

**S**

**T**

**U**

**F**

**F**

**W **

**E **

**L **

**L**

"Wow. That is cool. But who was the flat guy that gave Snake the note?" Buddy wondered.

"it's a me!" a voice said. Everyone looked at the entrance to find…Paper Mario! "Me and G&W are good pals. He didn't want to leave post so he sent me to give Snake the note. But it's just a coincidence that there was a message." Paper Mario said.

"Olimar" Master hand said. "Yes?" "who ever appointed you detective?" "Uhhh….myself." "Who gave you the right?" "Crazy hand" "Ok." Master hand nodded to the best of his ability and floated away to do paperwork.

"Well I need a nap, two in a row on my first day is tiring. I'll be back in a few hours." Olimar left to his room.

-Olimar's room-

Olimar removed his helmet and jumped on the bed, pulling the covers over his head and trying to fall asleep. There was something wrong however, a note was on his pillow. Olimar turned the light on and read it.

_Dear Captain Olimar,_

_Sorry to disturb you as you are very busy with your duties as Detective. I need you to come to Link's room between the hours of 12:00 and 12:45, the only times that Master Hand sleeps. Why her room? Because the stages are restricted to anyone other than your team in the day, it is easy to reach/enter and Game&Watch does not care if anyone enter there._

_I can not explain further in a letter but please come, I am in need of your service._

_Sincerely, A smash bro in need._

Olimar folded the letter and set his alarm clock to 11:50. He fell asleep quickly because of his tiredness.

-later, 12:00 P.M-

Olimar slowly opened the door to Link's room and crept inside. He glanced around, not seeing anyone anywhere. He checked the bathroom, he checked the kitchen, he checked Link's bedroom, he checked under Link, no one was there.

"Pst…" Olimar continued searching "Pst!" Olimar the medicine cabinets. "PST!" Olimar found only prescription pills for a cold. "OLIMAR!" screamed a voice. Olimar jumped. "hmmmm, I didn't take your stupid comics Ganondorf…" Link stirred.

"who's there?" whispered Olimar, glancing around. "It's me." Said the familiar voice of…

--

Game and watch has been found, Olimar officially the detective, a smasher needs his help, and Link has strange dreams. Who is the smasher? Find out in the next chapter.

Captain Olimar Private Eye: The Mystery smasher.


End file.
